When I was in school I had a quote from Desmond Tutu on my bedroom wall:
“Remember there is only one way to eat an elephant, a bite at a time”
I didn’t have the best of times in school and this quote got me through some of my lower times. Instead of looking at the whole picture, I learnt to deal with things one day at a time. Bite sized chunks were far more manageable. (please note that I am in no way condoning eating elephants!)
Many years later, when my marriage fell apart and I was left trying to piece back together two small childrens hearts, a good friend told me something which has got me through life ever since:
In every negative is a positive, you just have to find it!
It turned out to be true. I have learnt to find the positives. Some are small, some are hard to find, but there is usually one hiding there somewhere. Those positives get me through the harder times.
To the parent sat on their childs bedroom floor watching helplessly as they scream, cry and bang their head saying they want to die.
To the parent who hasn’t slept for more than three hours in a row for as long as they can remember, getting up one more time.
To the parents that hardly talk anymore, too drained they can’t even cry.
To the parent that had to give up work long ago to homeschool, and watched all their friends move on without them.
To the parents that are called every name under the sun trying not to react or show how much it hurts.
To the parents that walk away from the school gate, leaving their child to cry.
To the parents sat in that meeting being told a diagnosis for the first time.
To the parents going alone with no help at all.
To the parents that didn’t realise 30 years later they would still be needed so much, and are wondering what will happen when they aren’t there any more.
To the parents that are feeling like they cant carry on, that it never ends, that they are helpless.
Please remember that you are not alone. You are doing a brilliant job. You can be strong. Take a minute to believe in yourself.
Take each day as it comes and pat yourself on the back for conquering the small things.
Remember that there is a positive hiding in every negative, you just have to find it!
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